Last night, I spent some of my night at the emergency room. My granddaughter (9 months old) fell and scratched her head. Her mother (first time mother) was in a panic so she took her to the ER. The doctor cleaned up the womb, but a Band-Aid on her and sent her on her way.
She basically had a bump and a bruise.
As I was sitting in the hospital room, I started thinking about how marriages have bumps and bruises. The first question that came to mind is: Do we run to get help to heal our bumps and bruises in our marriage?
All marriages will face a few bumps and my even get a bruise or two. How we attend to these bumps and bruises will determine how long we are in recovery.
When we are faced with a “bumps and bruises” in our marriage we should take the same urgency to get the “bumps and bruises” healed as we do when we are sick or our children are sick.
Don’t allow the “bumps and bruises” to go untreated. Untreated “injuries” will result in an infection or spread to other vital parts [in the marriage] and we do not want that to happen.
How to treat Bumps & Bruises:
- Notice the “bumps & bruises” immediately
- Share with your spouse about the “bumps and bruises” you are experiencing
- Set aside a time of day that works best for you and your spouse to discuss the recent “bumps and bruises” and discuss a game plan to eliminate those “injuries” in your marriage
- If you are unable to come to an amicable agreement, then it may be time to seek outside help from a professional, your clergyman, or the married couple who are your mentors.
- Call a truce! Your marriage and the foundation you are building is more important than any “bumps and bruises.”
Don’t get discouraged or allow these temporary bumps and bruises to consume your marriage. It’s a normal part of marriage. It’s your “reaction” to these bumps and bruises which is more important and will determine how much recovery time your marriage will experience.
Most importantly with any injury, it’s vital that all involved are aware of the situation so make sure you keep the lines of communication open. Talk with your spouse!
What are some ways you treat the “Bumps and Bruises” in your marriage?
Ellen Christian says
What great advice. Thank you so much for sharing.
Debbie Denny says
Very good advice! Love the way you put it together!
Jackie Griebel says
Great article! Things we should all keep in mind!
Debbie Lamb says
Cute way to explain differences in marriage. After 37 years together..we deal with weekly bumps and bruises….we really try to prevent any broken bones! 🙂 With a broken bone there is always a longer healing period..some heal faster than others…but they all take time and special care! Important to note that if you don’t care for the bumps and bruises and minor cuts..you just might get an infection and that will result in major issues down the road!
jennifer zuna says
Ive fallen in love with your blog! 🙂
Shawna says
Great advice, Pamela! Thanks so much for putting relationship strains in a brand new light for me.
malia says
In my opinion talking it out is always the best. Communication is key to any relationship!
Still Dating My Spouse says
Malia,
Yes communication is definitely top priority; however, everyone don’t understand the proper dynamics of conversing calmly and as adults. That take skill especially when you are MAD.
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
No problem Shawna! Thanks for stopping by.
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
Awe, Jennifer thank you! Please stop by again.
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
Debbie,
I love it! Prevent broken bones…Love it Love it! 37 years of marriage what a blessing. Please feel free to give us any tidbits you would like to share with other couples. Ummmm sounds like I need to interview you!
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
Thanks Jackie!
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
Thanks Debbie.
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
Thanks Ellen!
Pamela
Eileen says
Well said! You can’t change people, only your reaction to them!
Still Dating My Spouse says
Eileen,
Absolutely! If we control our reactions then a lot of the bumps and bruises can be minimum.
Pamela
OneMommy says
Wonderful advice! I know from experience if you let those little bumps and bruises go, they get bigger and bigger….
Stopping by from BF.
Debbie Walter says
Great way of looking at marriage. Comparing marriage to bumps and bruises brings it down to terms everyone can understand. Thanks!
Still Dating My Spouse says
Debbie,
Sometimes we have to take the mystery out of marriage and relate it to something we all understand. Thank you for visiting SDMS please don’t be a stranger.
Pamela
Still Dating My Spouse says
OneMommy,
Yes, unattended bumps and bruises will go grow!
Pamela
Norma Neal says
Great advice. Couples always have to work on the relationship.
Anthony says
I love this article God bless you!!!