I challenge each of you to think about, write about, and share with your spouse 5 meaningful married moments that you guys have shared from the time you said I Do until present.

Here are my 5 Memorable Married Moments:

1. In 2004, we renewed our vows (6^th wedding anniversary) and honeymooned in Jamaica; however, the honeymoon was interrupted by Hurricane Ivan. Oh, this trip was very meaningful because I learned then to trust and rely on my husband without questioning him.
2. Our date nights!
3. Our Hawaii trip! I had recently had foot surgery and my hubby had to push me around Hawaii in a wheelchair most days because I couldn’t do all the walking. He didn’t even complain!
4. In 2010, when the last child left home! EMPTY NESTERS…
5. The birth of our first grandchild!

It was pretty hard to narrow it down to five but I had fun talking with the husband about memorable moments we have shared in our 14 years together. I couldn’t add them all, but the time discussing them was fun as well (another meaningful moment).

What a great idea for a date night: Share your memorable moments while sipping  on your  favorite beverage, sitting in  front of a fireplace! Don’t be surprised when their list doesn’t look like your list!  Hey, but the cool thing is you guys will laugh and share again the memorable moments of your marriage.

Share your memorable married moments with us in the comments below and remember to share this post with your married friends and social media friends!

Tennis: Yes, Tennis is very difficult. But, playing tennis means getting a phenomenal work out, and learning teamwork! It’s essential when playing tennis, to not take yourself too seriously. Don’t set out to hit every single ball. Decide to have fun, try hard, and break a sweat. Just think of it this way, the more dips and swoops you have, the more calories you’ve burned! Start off the game with lots of patience, and a basket full of tennis balls!

Bad-Mitten: Slightly easier than tennis, Bad-Mitten is ideal for helping with coordination. This game can be very relaxing and enjoyable. Similar to tennis, the dips and turns might seem rough, but they offer a fantastic workout! A plus to playing bad-mitten: The birdie doesn’t hurt near as badly as a tennis ball.

Ping Pong: Though given a reputation for being loved by nerds, ping-pong is a very competitive sport. The lovely part about ping-pong is that it can be played indoors, and with little to no equipment. Purchase some paddles and ping pong balls, and simply use a table you already own, just be sure to move all of the lamps and vases before the swinging starts.

Running: Many people are intimidated by this word. If you are, face your biggest fears with your significant other! Start training slowly and build up the miles slowly. Begin by walking several miles together. In the following weeks, build up to a light jog. From there, work up to light running, then eventually sprints (if you desire). The process is completely manageable, and you will be much more motivated working alongside your partner!

 Bicycling: For slightly less joint pressure, opt for bicycling together! Make a daily or weekly routine, and go exploring together. Take your bikes down to the local park for the day and plan a small picnic. Discover new places together and just enjoy being outside!

If you are particularly experienced in a specific sport, and your partner is not especially fond of your sport, it would be wise to start fresh with a new sport that you both haven’t had experience with! Newbies usually don’t enjoy being coached by a pro, and professionals usually don’t enjoy playing down to beginners. Unless you partner is incredibly understanding and patience, starting fresh with a new experience will probably be the best plan!

By stepping outside that comfort zone, the two of you might actually discover a new sport that you like! Getting over that initial hump of “this is entirely too hard for us” can often result in a new found love and appreciation for athletics

Elise Hutton is a writer who enjoys covering everything from wedding favors to relationship issues.

Welcome to the
February Freebies Giveaway Hop

Each participating blogger is hosting their own giveaway, with prizes worth at least $20. Be sure to hop through all participating blogs and enter their giveaway!

Click here to view the list of other giveaways included in this hop…

(Disclosure: I was not compensated for this post in any way. This giveaway is not sponsored by Restaurant.com. The Dinner Club was purchased by me with my own funds. This giveaway is not associated with Facebook)

Husband: “I thought we connected last night.” *wink wink

Who is right?

First we must understand what constitutes intimacy. Dictionary.com defines intimacy as a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group.

So, in laymen’s terms, intimacy is when you and your spouse are familiar with the deepest interworking of each other. Your knowledge goes deeper than what most would see on the surface and even with knowing your spouse that deep you still have love that won’t dissipate.

But…How do we get to the level of “true” marital intimacy?

First and foremost, you must be willing to commit to understanding and meeting your spouse physical and emotional needs. To accomplish this task you must become one in marriage and in all things.

INTIMACY IS AN ACTION!

You and your spouse must be willing to learn the language that will speak to the soul of your spouse. The only way to learn this language is to actively engage and pursue your spouse in dialogue, touching, and togetherness.

Secondly, your understanding of your spouse intimacy requirements should be apparent in everything you do.  This ties in with you really understanding your spouse intimacy language and you speaking it back to them in ACTION!

Third, TAKE OFF the mom and dad hats. Approach your martial intimacy as BFFs, lovers, husband and wife. Being parents is just an offspring of your marital union but it is not the only part of being married. Constantly approaching each other in Mom and Dad role, can and will, hinder you from truly understanding your spouse intimacy language. Think about it, if you are always in parent role, the only thing you are talking about is the kids, what is going to happen when the kids grow up and leave home? You guys will be lost and will not know each other on a deep intimate level.

Fourth: DATE! I know I can remember when I was dating my husband, we would talk all the time about any and everything. We really enjoyed the little things in life. We DATE[d] each other and as married couples we must continue to date.

When we are dating someone we are very interested what makes them tick and why they are ticking the way they are. We delved deep to understand who they were and we listened intently to every word that came out their mouth. INTIMACY LANGUAGE!

Get creative on planning and sticking to date nights. I know I have said time and time again, dating your spouse is beneficial to building strong healthy marriages and you can definitely add that it will help you learn your spouse Intimacy language.

To develop a deep profound marital intimacy with your spouse takes time but once you guys get to that level of intimacy it will be life/marriage changing. Don’t take my word for it…go ahead and begin learning your spouse intimacy language.

Do you and your spouse have a deep level of intimacy? Would your spouse agree with your answer? Share your thoughts in the comments below and share this post with your spouse and other couples that could benefit from reading it.

P.S. in the example above, the husband and wife were right; however, they were speaking their own INTIMACY LANGUAGE instead of speaking their spouse INTIMACY LANGUAGE!

You’re like a mirror to my soul but a queen

(My queen)

And finally now, I know just what that means, oh yeah

You’re the blessing I never thought I would get

And to the Lord I humbly bow my head

Beautiful words to express how you feel about your spouse. Usher Raymond really poured out his heart to the love of his life. He really wanted her to know that “Here [he] Stand.”

Do you have the same sentiments when it comes to standing with your spouse? This would include the good times, the bad times, and the ugly times. Many of us would say yes I will be there through thick and thin; however, it’s easier said than done.

Building a strong bond, relationship, and communication in marriage takes hard work. As we know, people changes, situations changes, values and priorities changes which will breed uncertainty and differences in marriage.

When situations become tough, it’s hard to believe that you will be able to stand with your spouse through thick and thin but you can.

Steps to Overcome Obstacles

1. First, be mindful of the words you use because they shape your mindset and actions.

2. NEVER use negative words to describe your marriage, situation, or spouse

3. Pray and ask God to be a shield and beacon to help you get pass this hiccup

Most obstacles are fanned and kept alive by disagreements or arguments. We must understand that we cannot get past obstacles in our marriage if we do not recognize that a change must take place.

Disagreements occur because our needs weren’t met. When there is a disagreement don’t feed the fire with sharp words instead stop, pray, & think…sometimes its best to let things cool off.

Never allow a weak moment (disagreement) to take away from the foundation (bond) you & your spouse are building. Remember you took a vow to stand together as one through sickness (bad times) and in health (good times).

Keep in mind that no conflict, obstacle, or disagreement is stronger than the bond and/or love that you and your spouse has for each other.

Here is your new affirmation: Here [I] Stand with my spouse hand and hand just as I did on my wedding day. I promised before God to become one with him/her and I will until the day I die. My spouse means more to me than winning any disagreement. Amen.

In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.- 1 Peter 1:6-7

What are your plans to remain standing with your spouse? Post your comments below but share this post with your friends and family; it could really benefit someone.

So we have moved to www.stilldatingmyspouse.com

Please join me over there. If you subscribed to receive the blog posts via email please sign up again on the new site (sorry, they did not carry over).

I’m really excited and I know you will be just as excited. I have some great things planned and I don’t want you to miss any of it….

So jump on over to www.stilldatingmyspouse.com . Bookmark the new site, subscribe to the new site, and comment!

I really appreciate all your support!

Today is celebrated as the day for lovers. Husbands (& wives) will use today to publicly display their love for their spouse. Flowers, candy, & teddy bears will be delivered to many today and will sit on the desk of the loved ones for all to see.

Many use today, to recommit their love to each other. Flowers, candy, and teddy bears are great & definitely overrated; however, I invite you to share your love for your spouse to hundreds and even thousands via your social networks. In the digital age we live in there are many ways to publicly express your love for your spouse.

15 Ways to utilize your social media accounts-Facebook, Twitter, & Pinterest-to publicly display love

1. Use a picture of the two of you as your profile picture on Facebook or as your avatar on Twitter.

2. Write daily affirmations of love on your spouse page for the number of years you have been married. (Example: Married 13 years=13 days of affirmations)

3. Post a picture collage video of you and your spouse throughout the years.

4. Do a musical tribute to your spouse on your page but tag them in the post. YouTube is a great source to get music videos and it’s easy to upload to Facebook.

5. Use #5reasonswhyIlovemyhusband on Twitter & list the reasons & tag him in the tweet (for husbands use same hash tag but change to wife)

6. Dedicate a day to use your status and/or tweets to uplift your spouse…Praise them for their accomplishments, for providing, or just being a great day/mom.

7. Send your spouse an I Love you tweet

8. Share an uplifting/motivating scripture on your spouse FB page or tweet it to them.

9. Use FB notes to write a love letter to your spouse.

10. Schedule random love tweets for 30 days to post on twitter…remember to @ your spouse!

11. Use the letters of your spouse name to define the way you feel about them in a status on FB & twitter…make sure you tag them.

12. Post clues or hints on your spouse FB page/twit clues to your spouse about the special date night you have planned.

13. Make a page on Facebook dedicated to your spouse.

14. Use a picture of your spouse as your background pattern for your twitter page

15. Create a pin board on Pinterest of things your spouse like and places you guys have been

I invite you to look at a video my husband made for me in 2009 for our wedding anniversary. You don’t have to wait until Valentine’s Day to publicly display your love. Use every day as a way to let the world know that love is in the air & marriages are not a dying breed.

Share your ideas of ways to show love to your spouse on Facebook, Twitter, and other social media outlets.

Which one of the above mentioned ideas do you like the best?

But how can you stay true to that statement? It’s hard but we definitely can fulfill that promise.

5 Love principles:

1. You have to encourage one another
   • Never tear your spouse down
   • When was the last time you praised your spouse with encouraging words?
2. Comfort one another
3. Spend time together
   • Spending time together helps strengthens relationships
   • If you grow apart you will come apart
4. Be tender and compassionate with each other
5. Be agreeable:
   • same values
   • same mindset concerning marital and parenting ideas

Love is an action verb. You must put in work to maintain a healthy strong marriage. There is no such thing as 50/50 or 80/20 when it comes to marriage. Its 100/100. We must do our due diligence when it comes to the staying power of our love.

I believe in you-you can “Always love your spouse.”

Which principle above do you need to improve on?

What a tragic weekend! One of America’s musical icons passed away: Ms. Whitney Houston (August 9, 1963-February 11, 2012). Ms. Houston you will truly be missed!

No one understood or even heard what the other one was saying and/or needed. It is only because we were speaking a language of “I” instead of the language of “we.”

We had to veer our language skills to include the language of each other. This is not an easy task but guess what we spoke the same language when we were dating.  When we were courting our potential spouse we paid close attention to the things that was pleasing to them but for some reason when we said “I Do” we fail to continue to learn our spouse language.

We all have heard that good effective communication is an essential part of a strong healthy marriage. You cannot have a strong healthy marriage if you and your spouse are speaking a different language.

5 Ways to improve the language in your marriage:

1. Practice active listening
2. Say what you actually mean…don’t drop hints…be specific!
3. Check and double check your attitude, tone, and body language when talking to/with your spouse
4. Be honest
5. Keep talking…

How can you improve the language that is spoken in your house? Share your ideas and suggestions in the comment box.

The Key to Romance from MarriageToday on Vimeo.