All of us know someone who has been in love and are now divorced. More than a million couples a year [in the U.S.A.] now end their expectations of marital bliss in divorce; indeed, it seems at times that no one out there is happily married. We recognize divorce is a worldwide problem, which indicates that unconditional love, effective communication and mutual respect are lacking in today’s marriages.
We, at Still Dating My Spouse, try to eradicate this problem with simple reminders to work hard at keeping that love going and really enjoy each other. Marriages get stale or people fall out of love because they fail to do the necessary daily marital tasks to keep the marriage fresh and the love alive.
Keys to a Successful and Lasting Marriage
Not the love that is song about and people write poems about but real unselfish love. Loving married couples have an intense love for each other because love covers a multitude of faults. Notice that love covers mistakes. It does not eliminate them, so we have to be forgiving and understanding. A happy marriage is made up of two good forgivers. Forgiving brings about respect, which brings us to our second key.
If two married people really love each other, then they will also have respect for each other, and respect is the second key to a happy marriage. Respect is defined as “giving consideration to others, honoring them. If you want to honor someone, you are kind to that person, respectful of that one’s dignity and expressed views, and ready to fulfill any reasonable request made of you. Therefore, love and respect are ingredients that must be practiced every day. Respect will help marriage partners to acknowledge differences in viewpoint. It is not reasonable to expect two people to have identical views on everything. What may be important to a husband may not be as important to a wife, and what a wife likes may not be what a husband likes. However, each should respect the views and choices of the other thus showing genuine love and respect. In order to do this we must learn to communicate which is our third key.
Love and respect are essential in a marriage but communication is a primary key. The loving husband will converse with his wife about her activities, her problems, her views on various matters. She needs this. A husband who takes the time to speak with his wife and really listens to what she says demonstrates his love and respect for her. Notice we said listen not necessarily run to fix the problem. Often the wife just needs a listening ear. Marriage partners manifesting love and respect will not see every disagreement as a challenge. They will work hard not to be “bitterly angry” with each other. Really communicate at the right time. Its imperative that you use your spouse love language and speak to them in the way they need to understand and feel appreciated.
Marriage is the oldest institution on earth, and it plays a vital role in human society. A strong marriage shapes stable future leaders (children) and great communities. Throughout history, strong families have helped to make strong societies. The family begins and sustains with a loving husband and wife.
What are the steps you take in having a successful marriage?