Raise your hand if you don’t even think about date night now that you have kids? Trust me, I understand that scheduling, thinking about, or even having a date night after having kids is impossible for some.
The idea of having the time or the energy to leave the kids and attempt to have an enjoyable night (day) alone is not a reality for many married couples. Yep, I hate to say it but many couples forgo dating once the little bundle of joys enters into the family.
[Tweet “many couples forgo dating once they have kids but both are important”]
We know exactly how taxing it could be to date while having and rearing kids. We had four kids and a niece that invaded blessed our home. Between carpool lanes, kids extracurricular activities, and the normally “adult” must do stuff: work and pay bills, we had little to no time to date. But we quickly realized that we had to do something different because we were losing ourselves and our marriage in the kids.
We quickly realized that we had to do something different because we were losing ourselves and our marriage in the kids.
Date Night: After Kids
Dating your spouse has nothing to do with spending money or going to a fancy restaurant, it’s about bonding and nurturing your relationship. It’s important that you keep your spouse a top priority and connect with your spouse daily.
Showing your kids that a positive balance in life and marriage is essential to a healthy strong marriage is the best lesson you can teach them about marriage.
But even with trying to be positive role models, it still doesn’t negate the fact that you have kids and less disposable time to date your spouse.
7 Ideas to a have a date night after kids
- Plan and Plan early: Sometimes spontaneity isn’t an option when you have kids. Plan your dates: from when, where, and how. Don’t leave any of the details to chance.
- Secure a babysitter: Get a friend or a trusted teenager to babysit for you. They can babysit even if you guys decide to stay at the house for a date. The reason for the babysitter is to relieve you of having to take care of the baby for a couple of hours. Care.com is good for locating reliable professional babysitters.
- Kid Swap: Find a trusting couple with kids and kid swap. Alternate date night weeks with other couples with kids. Watch their kids so they can go on a date and they will watch your kids for you guys to go on a date.
- Double Date at home: Share your date with other couples with kids. Enjoy adult time in the living room while the kids are playing or sleeping in the other room.
- Date after bedtime: Have a date with your spouse at home after the kids are in the bed. You can even put them in the bed an half hour earlier than usual. This will take some planning (see #1) in order to “tire” them out during the day so that they are ready for bed early.
- Date on the kids schedule: Plan a date while the kids are in school, at grandma’s house, or even taking their afternoon nap.
- Adopt a “grandmother”: Befriend one of the “mothers” of the church and adopt them as your children grandmother. They would be happy to babysit the kids for a couple hours so you and your spouse can date!
Now start planning a date with your spouse!
What do you have planned for you next date night?