So you guys just had a major disagreement. You mad. Your spouse mad. In the midst of the tension your spouse apologize but you are so hurt, how do you forgive and move on?
Forgiving
It’s really hard to let thins go when you feel like the victim. You just may be the victim but you don’t have to “act” like the victim.
If your spouse genuinely apologized and you accepted the apology, just how can you continue to hold on to the argument/disagreement? When you do hold on, you are not being truthful with your spouse and it does keep you guys from moving on.
How to move on
Yeah, yeah I know you mad and you have all rights to be mad; however, you told your spouse you forgive them.
With that forgiveness, you are saying to your spouse this discussion is closed and we came to a mutual agreement about the situation.
Now, if that’s not the case then say so! Don’t give your spouse false sense of security when in the back of your mind you are still holding on to resentment.
So what should you do:
Yes, I know it’s hard. I’ve been there done that but you stressing and still upset will not repair your marriage and move you guys forward.
How do you forgive and move on?
Please comment below. We look forward to your response.
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Sharon says
I always try to remember to fight fair and never use words that hurt long term. Good reminder to forgive.
Dawn says
It is really hard to forgive some things. But it is really important to do and fight fair afterwards. I find myself bringing up past mess with people a lot. I need to work on that. Thanks. 🙂
Dawn
Kelley Johnsen says
I do have the occasional fight and I just remind myself of all the wonderful things he does for me and how much he cares. I might be mad at the moment, but we all have bad days and this too shall pass. I like to remind him how much I love him and that we need to work together. We usually have a wonderful hug and forgive each other.
MELISASource says
I forgive and move on by realizing that whatever happened is in the past and there’s nothing that I can do to change that it happened, so I might as well keep moving forward.
Jesica H says
What if you didn’t forgive them in the first place? Then what?
Amber says
Fight fair…. that is alway a good rule to remember
(¯`•¸Geca Franco¸•´¯) says
Indeed, the only way to move on and keep moving on is to forgive. It’ll release all the pains and heartaches, thus freedom!
Jennifer Williams says
Sometimes it just takes a little bit of time to completely forgive. We always make extra time for each other after an argument which seems to help.
Janeane Davis says
After 22 years of marriage, I speak from experience when I say to make a marriage last, you must treat your spouse with dignity and respect at all times. This is especially true when the disagrements are strong because feelings are more sensitive and hurful things you say may cause permanent damage.
malia says
I usually am able to forgive and forget pretty quickly as I hate being mad with one another, but my hubby needs to learn to do the same!
Caroll says
It’s my mentality about forgiveness that helps me move on. I simply do not want to carry the burden that it takes to keep remembering what was said or done. So I let them know how I feel, how I was affected and that if it continues I will have to do what I need to do to feel safe and respected. Then I can move on. Then I trust myself to do what I say if it happens again. This way I don’t have to be on my guard waiting for them to mess up again. I have a plan and that is the biggest thing.
Alyssa McVey (Giveaway Overload) says
I act like I’m not mad until the anger leaves. If I go stomping around the house I’m going to stay mad. If I act like I’m fine and go about my day then my attitude with always improve. It takes work, but it’s worth it.
Brandi says
It’s definitely a lot easier for me to forgive now that I’m older. I’m able to look at the big picture, why did you do or say something, as opposed to the thing that you did or said. It definitely helps!
T. Espi says
Forgiveness is sometimes so difficult but it’s also very necessary.