Patience stands in the doorway where anger is clawing to burst in…-The Love Dare
Every Monday for the next 40 days, I will share with you a concept from Love Dare. Yes, this is a new year so why not start the year off with improving our marriage and our interactions with our spouse.
I did the Love Dare when it first came out. I must say I not only learned something about my spouse but I learned things about myself. We must remember that the things that are happening around us, we play apart in it. So when we can take a clear look at our actions we can improve the actions we do around others.
So I hope you will join us on this Love Dare journey for the next 40 days.
Day 1: Love is Patient
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.-Ephesians 4:2 NIV
We get married because we LOVE our potential spouse. We believe love will cure all things. Love will change a person, a situation, a relationship.
We must understand that love is action. Per the Love Dare, love is built on two pillars: patience and kindness.
Merriam Webster defines patient as not being hasty or impetuous. Being married and having to share our space with our spouse day in and day out, we must make sure we have a patient spirit. Just like us, our spouse is human and subject to make mistakes. We must make sure we are not “hot heads” and blow everything out of proportion.
We have very high exceptions for our spouse. When your spouse actions doesn’t align with our exceptions do you retaliate or respond with anger?
We all want a peaceful home and a loving marriage, so to get this one thing you must display is PATIENCE!
He who is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who is quick-tempered exalts folly”-Proverbs 14:29
This Week Dare:
The first part of this dare is fairly simple. Although love is communicated
in a number of ways, our words often reflect the condition of our heart.
For the next week, resolve to demonstrate patience and to say
nothing negative to your spouse at all. If the temptation
arises, choose not to say anything. It’s better to hold your
tongue than to say something you will regret.
Do you display patience with your spouse? Share some of the things you do to make sure you don’t overreact or respond negatively to your spouse.
I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEE the book!
I love the Love Dare, such an ecouraging and strengthening thing to do. When situations arise and I feel the need to release frustration on my husband, I don’t, I walk away and ask God to help me through and let go of the anger I feel. I tell my husband I love him and even though I don’t exactly agree with whatever it is that we are in discussion about, I will trust his decision and stand by him because that is what God wants us to do.
Regina,
Love the way you are talking! We must support our spouse.
Pamela
This is NOT going to be easy, but I’m up for the challenge! I love ny Jewel!
Liza,
Oh I know you do and just know that Satan will make you think it is impossible to be patient but your love for Jewel will make you finish the dare and work toward improving your marriage.
Pamela
I don’t have a spouse per se, but I do have a boyfriend. And this week I am going to try my hardest to be patient with him. :p I like the idea of this “Love Dare”.
Saying hi from the Ultimate Blog Challenge!
Angie Schaffer-von Scheffelheim recently posted..Beloved King Louis, XI
Beautiful post, Pamela! I have been married for almost 11 years to my amazing husband, Shawn…putting your marriage first makes all the difference in the world! <3
Emily,
You are so right putting your marriage first does make a world of difference. It eliminates so many issues pertaining to quality time.
Pamela
i have learned it’s WAY easier to bit my tongue than to get into it with my husband. most of the time, saying anything will NOT change the outcome, so it really is pointless.
I have found that if I open a document on the computer and write what I would say to him, I feel better. Then i delete the document.
sharon recently posted..What does a NEW mommy need.
Sharon,
What a great idea! Get it out & then delete plus this keeps you from having an additional argument. Love it!
Pamela
Pamela,
I’m still dating my spouse and I love your Love Dare for this year.
Love is forever. I’ll follow up on your posts during the blog challenge!
Sabrina recently posted..Soul Searching A Blog Of Confusion
Sabrina,
Thanks! & definitely keep dating your spouse!
Pamela
Great idea. Many people today forget that getting married means more than a wedding day dream come true. Marriage is is lived everyday in sickness and in health, for better and for worse, and for richer and for poorer. It isn’t all hearts and flowers. It takes real work. Thanks for the post.
Arleen Bradley recently posted..The Job Search isn’t a One Fits All Process
Arleen,
You said a mouthful of truth there! Thanks for stopping by!
Pamela
What a great way to start the year!!!
Sharon recently posted..Parenting with Scripture Book Review
Patience is not my virtue, lol….but I will try.
Dawn
Dawn recently posted..Printerpix Photo Albums, Canvases and Calendars #Bellies2Babies
LOL Dawn, at least you are willing to try!
Pamela
Great advice, my anniversary is this month 37 years…trust me it has taken lots of patience sometimes, a wonder I have a tongue left…haha..but I love him and I’ll keep him. Practice what you post and you will have a long time relationship with you honey too!
Julia Potvin recently posted..#Enjoy Professional Hair Care Product Review & Giveaway
Julia,
Wow congrats on 37 years! I would love to interview you about marriage, motherhood (if you are a mother), just being you in marriage.
Pamela
We always practice to not say anything we will regret. We have cool down periods and if we are angry when we go to bed, we will still tell each other we love each other. I love this series so far!
Jennifer Williams recently posted..Publix Ad 1/10/13 – 1/16/13
Oh Jennifer, I like the fact that you guys even if mad still have that intimate moment of saying I love you!
Pamela
Great advice, like always!
Isabella Grey recently posted..Lady Margaret
We have had our ups and downs lately, but hopefully being patient with each other will help out!
Kristin Wheeler (Mama Luvs Books) recently posted..My Favorite Item I Used Over The Holidays! #PinTheHalls
Kristin,
Yes, please remember to be patient and don’t respond so quickly.
Pamela
I always love to read your post Pamela! Thank you
Thanks Kelley!
Two things:
1. I really enjoy just the title of your blog- Still Dating My Spouse. I like the idea of continuing the building of the relationship, the courting, the good behavior and all the good parts of dating throughout a marriage.
2. I like the idea of getting the negative out of interactions with our spouses. The negative things will still exist, our spouses will do things we do not like. I like this challenge requiring us to change our thinking and the way we react. I will try your challenge this week.
Janeane Davis recently posted..Wonderful Wednesday – Show Up Like A Grown Up At Work
My husband and I were just talking about our relationship and how sad we are for couples who don’t have the kind of relationship that we do. I have read many books and learned much in the short 6 years we’ve been married. We have an amazing relationship and it just gets better over time. I’m excited to follow your series! I can never learn too much about how to be a better wife and a better companion.
Alyssa McVey (Giveaway Overload) recently posted..Tips About How To Set Successful Goals
this is a dare i need work on… some days, unintentionally, everything that comes out of my mouth, even when said with love, he thinks is “against” him. Holding my tongue, even when I think I am helping, might not come across that way to him. Looking forward to seeing today’s
Arelis Cintron (@DjRelAt7) recently posted..How do you MAKE Your Mark on the World? #MakeYourMarkES
Arelis,
I had the same problem and you know it was because of my Tone. Check out my Tone & Pitch post. I had to learn what to say, when to say it, and how to say it just so it wouldn’t be a confrontation.
This week we are working on Kindness. Can’t wait to hear your progress.
Pamela